Rainbows and Butterflies

Starting a club seemed like a great idea. I did it once before in sixth grade after all. Children against smoking parents, a.k.a. CASP. OK, not a great name, but for a few months in 1986 us four 12 years olds were determined to get our parents to quit smoking. None of our parents actually quit until many years later, and probably not because of our rad drawings…but still…clubs are FUN! I built great friendships in that club. 

As an adult, this club has been a lot more than homemade posters and sad letters to our parents. Everyone involved is a parent. Families and work, and in this case autism, fill our daily hours and we still manage to make time for our little autism social learning club. It started out as a simple idea about 3 months ago. Just a need that I wanted filled. My child NEEDS more social learning time. I NEED to be around people who understand our limitations and our goals in this process. So one day I asked some new mom friends I had started to know better at therapy what they thought of my idea. The brainstorm of possibilities that we unleashed in the therapy waiting room in that hour was amazing. Never underestimate moms united!! And that was the push I needed.

I was flying high for quite awhile. Like puppy love in junior high. It was all I could think about. I couldn’t wait to wake up and start planning some more. I worked on every detail until I fell into bed exhausted every night. Not the usual fall-into-bed-after-cleaning-up-after-kids-all-day, which I still was doing. This new purpose fueled me and I felt fantastic!!!! It made even washing dishes and wiping…stuff…better. Everything was rainbows and butterflies!

BUT, what goes up must come down. It’s like when the honeymoon ends and his dirty socks that never get picked up isn’t so cute anymore…and actually starts to make you feel slightly deranged and you wonder what you signed on for exactly. Yeah, it was like that. I felt overwhelmed and tired and things started to get complicated. I wondered if maybe I bit off more than I could chew. Did I still love this? Was this simple club worth all the hours of work? 


So here I am now. The stars are out of my eyes and I’m no longer infatuated with ‘the idea’. It’s real now and I’m married to it. I really enjoy being part of the team. I love giving our kids an opportunity to do stuff they are missing out on and I love pushing myself outside of my comfort zone. I’m remembering some skills that had gone dormant and that’s a big deal to a person who’s been a stay at home mom for 14 years. It’s nice to know that old part of myself is still there. 

I’ve been happily married to my wonderful husband for 18 years. He was actually MY puppy love infatuation in junior high. His dirty socks on the floor have turned into a family of five’s dirty socks on the floor. It’s not always rainbows and butterflies in our home. It’s hard work a lot of the time. But we work together. And that’s what makes it fun. Being together, we make it better.

Better Together

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Suzy Higley

Suzy Higley

Wife to my childhood sweetheart. Stay-at-home mom of 3 awesome boys, ages 14, 12, and 5. My youngest is non-verbal and has Autism. Currently starting a community with other Autism Moms called Better Together. More social learning opportunities for our kids on the spectrum are needed...and because I couldn't find them, I'm creating them. I also draw and paint on both paper and walls...and furniture. And speaking of furniture, I have a chronic furniture rearranging condition that I'm seeking help for. Not really...it's my favorite.

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